Thursday 5 March 2009

UGLY

"You're ugly"

Can their be two words that are more hurtful?

"He's ugly" "she's ugly" "he looks like shrek" etc etc. People seem to love calling each other ugly. You hear at least one person being insulted about the way they look everytime your outside. Everyone differs in degrees of sensitivity and everyone is different in what their sensitive about. So being called ugly may not bother some people. Some people may not care about how they look. it's just not that important to them. Other people however are not so lucky. Some people become so consumed with the perception of how they look it becomes an obsession. To the extent they feel they can't even leave the house. Their is a name for this: Body dysmorphic disorder. In a way it's unfortunate it's been named because it makes it sound like another thing people use to feel sorry for their selves and get attention. It will no doubt grow in "popularity" by the kind of people who say "iv'e got issues" even though they don't have a clue what it's like. It's a real shame that their being a name for it might cheapen this psychological illness. Because it's effects are far more devastating than you might think. This isn't just about haveing a bad hair day. Having body dysmorphic disorder means you constantly believe everyone is looking at you. Everone is judging you. All eyes are on you. And they are thinking about how ugly you are. Even if their not saying it out loud their thinking it. "I dont look like anyone else." "I look differant", "I look wierd." "like an alien." "How dare I even go out?" "my nose is bigger than anyone elses" "my whole head and body are misshapen" Such thoughts can make sufferers feel suicidal. Such a complete lack of confidence (and that's an understatement) manifests its self in body langauge, always prompting people to think the sufferer is "shy." It's unlikley that being called ugly a few times will make someone feel like this but rather one or more big bad events in someones life can trigger such an anxiety. And when someone is then told their ugly or told "you look like such and such" it feeds their anxiety. Even if someone doesn't seem hypersensitive about their looks it could be secretly knawing away at them. And it's the people who keep things bottled up who things effect the most. So the next time you go to say "you're ugly" or "you look like such and such" Stop, think-don't be a wanker.